I’ve Waited Ten Years for This

Tomorrow, I turn 30. My first holiday as a 30-something incidentally. Yep, I’m a turkey baby.

To be honest, I’ve been looking forward to my 30s for quite a few years. I always wanted to move right past that 20-something full-fledged angst  into at least knowing what I want.

I spend the past ten years in a lot of turmoil, most of it internally, the worst of it caused by something external, Cora’s death.

I went through the motions as a young 20-somethinger. I went out. Drank too much. Stayed out too late, but the whole time I wished it was socially acceptable for me to curl up at home with a good movie and my puppy. I’m glad to enter the time in my life where not only is it perfectly acceptable to do that, but I no longer care about outside expectations.

Cora gave me that gift, earlier than many of my peers might have learned it. She aged me. Just as my father’s death as a child made me wiser than my age.

I know I won’t feel differently tomorrow. I know life won’t change when the clock hits midnight. Inside, it’s an important milestone for me. I’m looking forward to stability and growing even more comfortable with myself.

Welcome 30s! I’ve been waiting for you. It’s time to cherish every moment that I have.